Night After the Female Titan
by aych13
Summary: This is an EruRi story I wrote, inspired by one of my very favorite Levi and Erwin sketches on the internet-included as the cover image with this story. **ALL credit to the artist (name is written on the drawing); I only wish I had half your talent. Story expands on events that took place after the Scouts returned to HQ after the failed 1st female titan expedition.


_At this point in the story, Erwin and Levi have been officially a couple for 2-3 years. Their close friends like Hanji and Mike know about it, but it's not general knowledge among the Scouts. Events take place after the Scouts have returned to HQ following the disastrous mission to trap the Female Titan; Erwin knows he has been summoned to the capital to hand over Eren, but does not yet have any kind of plan. _

Erwin Smith stood next to the window of his office, gazing out at the night sky. His normally busy mind was absolutely numb, but given the alternative he preferred it that way. At least for now. It was perhaps both his gift and his curse that horrifically failed expeditions like today's didn't typically paralyze him for long. But tonight…sharp fragments of disjointed thought attempted to drift onto the conscious level and Erwin deliberately fought them back: the fact that they had lost so many of the Survey Corps today, the fact that despite all the planning the Female Titan had managed to escape…the fact that it could very well be one of Erwin's last free nights out of jail depending what the authorities in the capital decided to do with him. The mission to prove Eren's usefulness outside the wall had failed utterly, with a massive body count, a missing Female Titan, and so many lives lost just in the attempt to keep Eren safe that it would be a hard sell indeed to convince anyone he had been worth it.

Bracing his fist against the window, Erwin briefly shut his eyes and leaned his head against his arm, allowing a rare moment of defeat to show through. Because he needed to prepare himself, this weakness had to be dealt with and pushed aside; there was someone else who needed him tonight. He caught a glimpse of his own candlelit reflection in the window; how was it that his face could still appear so calm and detached when inside he was in such turmoil? That's probably why they all called him a devil…

Sighing heavily, Erwin at last turned from the window as there was a soft knock at his office door. He knew who it was; he had sent Zoe Hanji to summon Levi to his office as soon as they arrived back at Scout headquarters. Erwin knew Levi needed him, but history had shown that when Levi was in as much pain as he was bound to be tonight, he didn't reach out unless he was invited first.

The door opened and Hanji poked her head in. "He's on his way, Erwin," she said quietly. "Can I….get you anything?" she asked somewhat hesitantly. Erwin locked eyes with her for a moment, then dropped his gaze to the floor and sighed. "No, we'll be alright, thank you Zoe. Please check on Eren at some point before you go to bed; let me know how he's doing." She nodded. "I'll do that now," she said quietly, then turned and left.

Erwin turned back to the window; it was only a couple moments later that he felt rather than saw Levi silently enter his office; Levi's anguish was so heavy it was almost physically palpable. Erwin knew roughly how Levi's day had gone: his entire squad had been killed, he had been injured, and Erwin had watched more or less helplessly as Petra's father had subjected Levi to his enthusiastic, clueless monologue about Petra's love for and devotion to Levi. To anyone else, Levi might have just looked blank, but Erwin had been able to see the sheer devastation on Levi's face; to have that final encounter today had been nearly unbearable for Erwin to witness, much less for Levi to have to endure.

"Close the door," Erwin instructed softly. His eyes averted, Levi did so; he then leaned against it with his head hung so low that his whole face was in shadow.

Erwin simply watched him for a few moments; their relationship was close enough that just being physically near Levi was often enough for Erwin to get a fairly solid idea of what Levi was feeling and what he needed. Studying him now, Erwin's breath caught slightly; he could not remember a time since Levi's friends Furlan and Isabel were killed that the pain he sensed from Levi had been this crushing. Erwin could see even from all the way across the room that his entire body was trembling.

"Levi…" Erwin murmured gently. The tenderness in his voice pierced through Levi's numb exterior; as though in slow motion, Levi's face crumpled in an agonized grimace as he appeared to simply collapse, sliding down the wall to the floor. Drawing his knees to his chest, Levi's upper body slumped forward as though it was too heavy to hold up anymore. He silently buried his head in his hands with his elbows braced on his knees, his clenched knuckles ghostly white against his black hair. He looked so tiny and alone that it broke Erwin's heart.

Erwin came around the desk and crossed the room, quietly kneeling down in front of the trembling Captain. He very gently wrapped his hands around Levi's wrists, tugging softly to encourage Levi to uncover his face and look at him. Levi raised his head and met Erwin's eyes for the barest space of an instant; the tortured anguish on his face caused tears to form in Erwin's eyes. Before Erwin could say or do anything more, Levi broke down completely, his body all but doubled over. His hands gripped his hair as racking, strangled sobs tore out of him.

Erwin's heart ached; very gently he placed one hand on Levi's back and with the other he tenderly stroked his hair. So few understood just how deeply Levi cared for other people, because his aloof nature hid it so well. Whatever the rumors, Erwin was not a sociopath, but he knew that his level of empathy did not even approach Levi's; thus he could only imagine what a day like today felt like for Levi to endure. Erwin felt both helpless to comfort Levi and horribly guilty for causing him so much pain in the first place. He sighed wearily; leaning protectively over Levi, Erwin continued to rub his back. For several moments there was no sound except for Levi's quiet, broken sobbing.

"Levi," Erwin asked so gently it was almost a whisper, "will you let me hold you? Please?"

Head still buried in his hands, Levi gave a slight nod. Smiling softly, Erwin leaned over and easily lifted Levi into his arms. "Come here, little one," he murmured tenderly as he slowly stood up, pulling Levi close and holding him against his chest so Levi was facing his body. Levi buried his face in Erwin's shoulder and wept as grief and exhaustion overwhelmed him.

Erwin slowly wandered around the room with Levi in his arms, eventually stopping in front of the large window behind his desk. He turned his body so Levi could see the stars and enormous glowing moon outside; Erwin knew Levi loved looking at them because of spending his entire life in the Underground prior to joining the Scouts. While they stood there, Erwin swayed slowly back and forth with Levi cradled against his body, like he would to comfort a baby. Erwin could see Levi's eyes reflected in the window; sure enough he was gazing enraptured at the beauty even as tears continued coursing down his face. Levi's childlike wonder at such simple things caused Erwin's heart to swell with even more affection for him; he wrapped his arms more tightly around Levi and gently kissed his cheek. Levi nuzzled into Erwin's neck and clung to him desperately as he continued to cry. "I've got you, Levi," Erwin murmured softly. "I'm right here."

Stopping by his desk, Erwin grabbed several tissues, then sat down on the couch holding Levi on his lap, cradling him tightly. Cupping Levi's face in his hand, Erwin gently wiped Levi's cheeks and nose; Levi's defenses were so low after so much emotion that he didn't even protest. Wearily he laid his head back against Erwin's shoulder; Erwin pulled Levi more tightly into his arms and very gently rocked him, laying his cheek against Levi's head.

Erwin eventually lowered his head a little and turned so he was looking into Levi's eyes. Gently brushing Levi's hair off his forehead, he said softly, "Levi, I understand if you don't want to talk about it, but I also don't want you to have nightmares tonight if we can avoid it. So tell me anything you need to. I'm here with you, and I'm glad to listen to you."

Levi hesitated and drew in a long breath as fresh tears leaked from his eyes. Much as he didn't want to relive the day, he knew Erwin was right—if he didn't get the images out of his mind and tell someone what had happened, he would just face it all over again in his sleep. At last he turned so his face was partially buried against Erwin's chest; he unconsciously wrapped one arm protectively around himself while he brought the other hand up and clung tightly to Erwin's jacket. Erwin smiled gently and wrapped Levi more securely in his arms so he would feel safe; he lowered his head right next to Levi's so he wouldn't have to do much more than whisper.

Steeling himself, Levi told Erwin the details of what had happened after he had gone to find Eren and his squad. His voice shook and tears streamed down his face as he told Erwin about finding them dead, one by one, then about how he and Mikasa had managed to retrieve Eren. The heartbreak he had been forced to hide at the time came pouring out as Levi managed to tell Erwin what had happened on the trip back; how he'd ordered the soldiers to dump the bodies so they could get away, finishing with the agonizing interaction with Petra's father. "Erwin, I n-never knew she felt that way…how did I not know? I could've explained I like guys…What if she thought I just rejected her and died thinking that….?" Levi's voice broke completely and he couldn't continue. It had all just been too much today. He turned and buried his face in Erwin's chest, his tears soaking Erwin's shirt.

"Oh, Levi…." Erwin murmured softly, stroking Levi's hair back from his forehead. "My sweet baby. I'm so very, very sorry." He cradled Levi more tightly against his chest with one arm while he looped the other beneath Levi's legs and lifted him into a sort of bridal-style cradle hold so that Levi was laying back in Erwin's arms and Erwin could see his face better. He went back to slowly pacing the room while he rocked Levi in his arms and just allowed him to cry, gazing tenderly into his eyes as he caressed Levi's face. The gentle motion helped Levi calm down; the tears gradually slowed again and he just relaxed back into Erwin's arms, leaning his head into Erwin's shoulder as his eyes started to look rather sleepy.

"I think you should tell her, Levi," Erwin at last said gently. He hesitated for a moment, then continued quietly, pensively, "I've never known exactly what I think happens after people die, but I do think they can still hear us and see us to at least some extent. We're going to have at least a couple quiet days between now and whatever the capital decides…when you have some time alone and feel up to it, I think it would help you to tell her."

Levi gazed up into Erwin's eyes, tears still slowly streaming down his face. Part of it sounded incredibly foolish, but….on the other hand, he knew exactly what Erwin meant. He sometimes found himself saying things to Furlan and Isabel and even his mother as though they were still here, and didn't he always feel less alone afterward? Closing his eyes for a moment, Levi at last nodded slowly. "I….I'll try." He sighed and snuggled his head into Erwin's neck. "I'm glad I'm not the only one who does that," he finally said so softly that Erwin almost didn't hear him. Smiling gently, Erwin shook his head and kissed Levi's forehead. "You most definitely are not, dear one," he replied quietly.

Erwin eventually settled them back on the couch again; grabbing a blanket, he placed a pillow under Levi's legs and one behind his own arm that cradled Levi's head, then spread the blanket over the two of them. Leaning forward, he softly kissed Levi's nose, then his lips. "I love you Levi," Erwin whispered. He wasn't sure whether Levi was even still awake, but then Erwin saw a tiny smile play at the corners of his mouth. "I love you too, Erwin" Levi whispered so softly Erwin would not have even heard if he hadn't already been staring at Levi's face. Without opening his eyes, Levi snuggled into Erwin's chest and, seemingly unconsciously, raised his hand to his mouth and rested his thumb just below his bottom lip. He wasn't sucking his thumb but it was very easy to catch a glimpse of what he would have looked like as a child when he had; Erwin smiled affectionately at how vulnerable and cute he looked. Very gently he stroked Levi's hair off his forehead and traced his face with the tips of his fingers, rocking him as he watched the last of the tension leave Levi's face as he fell asleep in Erwin's arms.

An hour or so later, there was a very quiet knock at the door; Erwin was relatively certain it was Hanji reporting on Eren, so he answered quietly "come in." Sure enough, Zoe entered the room and started toward Erwin; seeing Levi asleep on his lap, she stopped in her tracks and a huge, affectionate smile spread across her face. Erwin gave her a gentle smile in return; Zoe tiptoed closer then squealed under her breath; Erwin chuckled quietly and mouthed "shhhh."

"Look at his cute little face!" Zoe whisper-squeaked, causing Erwin to chuckle again.

Levi stirred slightly; he was exhausted enough he almost didn't care who it was, but he peeked over anyway and saw that it was Zoe. She was one of his best friends and already knew that he and Erwin were together, so he promptly relaxed again. "Hi Hanji," he murmured sleepily.

Taking the opportunity, Zoe came closer and knelt down in front of the couch so she was eye-level with Levi. "Hi, sweetie," she said softly, laying her hand on his and gently brushing her fingers across his forehead. "I'm just updating Erwin on some stuff; go back to sleep and we can talk more tomorrow, okay?" Levi nodded and closed his eyes again; Hanji caressed Levi's face then leaned over and softly kissed the top of his head. She didn't know all the details, but she had learned enough from Eren to know that Levi had had the day from hell; she was relieved to find him still safely with Erwin.

"Has his leg been bothering him much?" Hanji asked Erwin quietly as she met his eyes over Levi's head.

Erwin shook his head. "It hasn't seemed like it," he replied softly, gazing down at Levi.

Zoe nodded, thoughtfully studying Levi's face. "He definitely didn't break anything," she said, her voice low. "I felt all the bones and had him walk on it when I went to see him earlier; I think it's just a bad sprain."

She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small vial of liquid, then handed it to Erwin. "If it's hurting him later on, he can take this to help with the pain."

Erwin nodded. "Thank you Zoe," he murmured quietly, giving her a soft, grateful smile. She gazed at him and the compassion was evident in her eyes. She reached over and gently put her hand on Erwin's shoulder, giving him an affectionate squeeze, then dropped into a chair next to the couch. Leaning forward with her elbows on her knees and gazing at Erwin, she asked gently "How are _you_ holding up?"

Erwin sighed, averting his eyes and slowly shaking his head. "I think I haven't really processed it much, to tell you the truth," he said quietly. "I was worried enough about this one"—he glanced down at Levi, his eyes soft—"that it gave me a way to avoid my own thoughts." Shaking his head again, he chuckled ruefully. "Probably not tremendously healthy method of dealing with it…guess I should work on that."

Hanji nodded and sat for a moment in pensive silence, her head tilted so that her glasses appeared briefly opaque. "Well, before you plunge too deep into the abyss, I have some information that may help," she murmured quietly. "Erwin," she continued, "I actually hadn't meant to spend that long with Eren—he's doing fine by the way, Mikasa is watching him like a hawk—but I ended up talking to Armin for a long time after Eren went to sleep. He...well...he thinks he knows who the Female Titan is."

Erwin's head shot up; he gazed at Zoe in astonishment. "Who?" He asked quietly. "And how?"

Zoe lowered her voice and leaned further forward, her eyes locked on Erwin's. "The 'who' is...Annie Leonhart. As to the 'how'...it sounds like Armin had a closer encounter with her today than anyone else—anyone else who lived to tell about it, that is. Apparently Armin and Jean encountered her almost immediately after she had decimated the right flank but before she had made much progress toward locating Eren. Armin told me he fell off his horse when she ran over the top of him...when he was on the ground, she just...well, crazy as it sounds, she gently lifted his hood off his face to see who he was, but didn't even try to hurt him. She was about to kill Jean, but when Armin yelled out "avenge that suicidal maniac!" she paused to listen…I guess that was Eren's nickname among the 104th cadets? Anyway, through it all Armin was able to study her features and the way she physically carried herself...he told me it was identical to how Annie has acted around him before."

Erwin looked dazed as Zoe continued, "On top of that, Armin noticed that the day the cadets were required to submit their ODM gear for inspection, Annie submitted Marco's as her own; Armin recognized the markings because he'd helped Marco do maintenance on it. So that pretty much places her as the prime suspect for killing Sawney and Beane as well."

Clearly shocked, Erwin leaned back against the couch, pondering this new information. "Annie Leonhart..." he repeated under his breath. He shook his head slowly as though trying to get the information to sink in.

Hanji continued quietly, "As much evidence as that already is, I have an idea of how we could solidify the case even further. Since Annie is in the military police, we need to come up with a reason to find out what her assignment has been for the past couple days. If it was somewhere that she was going to be largely unsupervised and able to disappear for extended periods of time with no one noticing..." Zoe's voice trailed off, but Erwin knew what she was getting at.

"Nile," he murmured softly. "I'll find a reason to talk to Nile Dok tomorrow. Things are...strained...between us now, but back when we were cadets, we were good friends. He would know what Annie's most recent assignment was."

Hanji nodded slowly. "I'm sure this is occurring to you as it is to me, but Erwin...if this pans out it could be enough to save Eren and keep him away from the Military Police...not to mention keep them from disbanding the Scout Regiment."

They stared at each other as the significance of the conversation sunk in. Erwin felt rekindled determination spark inside his heart; suddenly their situation did not seem quite so hopeless.

Zoe shook her head and chuckled quietly. "Well, I've either made it so now you can sleep knowing we have something like a plan again...or so that you won't sleep a single second because you'll be going over every possible detail from now until the sun comes up." She sighed. "Why do I get a bad feeling it's going to be the second scenario?"

Erwin gave her a rather sheepish smirk. "It's alright," he replied quietly. "I wanted to sit up with Levi anyway, so this just means I'll be making plans while I do that rather than wallowing in despair and self-pity."

Zoe chuckled again and rose to her feet. "Erwin, the day I see you having anything like 'self-pity,' I think I'll kiss a titan."

Erwin laughed quietly. "Oh dear god, in that case I am motivated to avoid it at all costs."

Zoe opened the door quietly. "I'll come by first thing in the morning; feel free to send someone to get me if you need anything before then." She gave Erwin a playful, knowing smile. "Take care of our little Levi, but do _try_ to get at least an hour or two of sleep yourself, okay?"

Erwin smiled and inclined his head in a non-committal acknowledgement, but didn't answer.

Zoe rolled her eyes. "Why do I even bother saying it..." she muttered as she closed the door behind her.


End file.
